Weird feelings these days....

So I guess I really came to realize today that I'm truly going home in 4 days. I mean I always knew when I was leaving, and have had a flight booked since March. However, now that the time has come it seems to surreal. I have been feeling really strange these past couple weeks. Actually, I have been feeling a lot like I did right before I left to come to Mexico at the beginning of January. I'm anxious, scared, nervous, happy, excited, and sick to my stomach.

Some might be wondering why I feel so "nervous" and "anxious" to come home? I think that my good friend Paige put it perfectly today while having lunch. She said, "its weird because the only people that will ever understand this entire journey for the past five months are the 11 of us that are here now." Its so true. I never thought of it like that. I never realized that when I tell a story, or have moments where I miss Mexico the only ones that will fully understand everything are the people who were here with me. I think that is what kind of makes me nervous. I have been here for five months, and have had so many amazing experiences, but those back home have been living their lives normally. However, for me coming back home is a new beginning. Although its a familiar sight for me to see its one that I haven't seen for many months now. The culture I will be going back into for me is considered strange and unordinary.

Despite this all I'm excited to return, and have so much to look forward to. I just never expected to be feeling this way as I prepared to come BACK to the U.S. :)

Hasta Luego

I can't believe the time has come...

I honestly can't believe the time has come for me to return to the U.S. Lately I have been feeling so many different feelings about going home. Obviously, I'm so very excited to see everyone that I love and miss dearly back home, but at the the same time I can't remember what life was life before I came to Mexico. When people told me that eventually I would become immersed in the culture of Mexico I laughed. However, now as I prepare to go back home I know exactly what they meant. I have become completely immersed in the culture and language that define Mexico.

This study abroad experience has truly been amazing. I honestly can't even begin to describe all of the things that happened, and how I have grown as a person from this experience. As difficult as it will be to leave Mexico in 7 days I realize that this is just one part of my life. My time here in Mexico is something I will carry with me forever and ever, but now I realize the time has come for me to move on with my life. In 6 days I will be a senior in college. Scary thought, I know. I have really been thinking about what an exciting time in my life this is right now. I'm about to return home from a semester studying abroad, I'm going to start my last official summer break, and then in a couple months I'm going to either apply to graduate school, find a job, or both! I return to the U.S. with knowledge, memories, and motivation that will serve me will in my future.

I don't know exactly what my future entails.  I have no way of knowing exactly what is going to happen, and that used to bother me. One important thing I have learned about Mexico is to "slow down and smell the coffee." This doesn't mean that I have become unmotivated or will no longer work hard, but rather I will appreciate the times when I don't need to. Right now, I stand at the doorsteps of my future, BUT for the next three months I'm not going to enter the house :)